Grandma called to see if we knew what had happened to her TV-set. She said there was some sort of plastic dinosaur stuck in the screen. Mum told her that some kids at her party were fighting over who got to play with it and then one of them decided it was better if no one had the dinosaur at all and threw it away. Grandma said something about having no recollection of inviting kids to her party, let alone dinosaurs. She was also wondering why the lights weren’t working anymore and why one of the chairs had a leg missing and where her bed sheets had gone to. That’s when Mum decided to go over and have a talk about the party with Grandma. I was not allowed to come not even if I had wanted it really bad.
When Dad came home and found Mum was gone he decided it was his turn to cook. I begged him, please, and pretty please, and pretty please with cream and a cherry on top, and added some chocolate sprinkles too, just so he would change his mind and not cook but to just go out and get some fish ‘n’ chips, but alas. I know that fish ‘n’ chips is not part of my diet and is actually quite bad for me, but Dad’s cooking would be bad for my taste buds not to mention the fact it would be hazardous to my life and we all know: without life no diet; and man, I loooooove this diet. He started cooking anyways, but gave up when the chicken had burnt and the saltshaker dropped into the boiling water with the potatoes in it (okay, that was my bad). Fish ‘n’ chips it was.
Mum came home at eight. She had had dinner at Grandma’s and she had helped clean up the last bits. Grandma does not seem to remember an awful lot about the party. Nobody, so far, has said anything about a divorce or signing divorce papers. It’s not clear if Nora and Jonesy remember anything at all and what they remember? I would gladly fill in the blanks and spice the story up a little if it would help them make a decision that would be better for everybody. I did offer Mum of providing my services to make this a better world for us and them and told her I was very cheap, but she declined. I think it won’t be wise to call up Jonesy and tell him the story anyways as some sort of . I’ll leave it for the time being.
Talking about relationships. I know of one relationship that is working out pretty well. Evelyn and I are really serious at the moment, though we still haven’t properly kissed. We are walking around hand in hand, we eat at the same table, and Evelyn said she had eternalized our love in one of the bathroom stalls. School rule amongst pupils is that if it’s written down in a bathroom stall, it’s a fact. Spelling and grammar mistakes are permitted provided that the sentence is still clear to all and sundry. So there you have it. The only problem is telling Mum and Dad about my love life. I have no idea what their reaction would be. Our family has never had to deal with such a situation before. I think I’ll practise my story on Cheddar. I’ll do that … now. See me tomorrow.