I Wish I Knew A Good Title For This

10-04-2014  Thursday wishing it was Friday

Today was parents’ evening at school; guess who wasn’t invited to come. That’s why it’s called parent’s evening. They tell you that it’s not nice to gossip and talk behind people’s backs and what do they do!? Inderdeedy, they talk about you behind your back. My parents are quite lucky to have a kid like me. I hardly ever get into trouble, my marks are good (though I must admit that I am not a straight A student), and teachers hardly even notice I’m there. That is why normally my parents come home after a parents’ night, pad me on the back and say something like,’ Carry on, son.’ Sometimes my Dad gives me one of his quotes,’ Live long and prosper.’ And he makes this weird sign with his hands.
Things didn’t go like that today. When they came home Mum was holding a piece of paper in her hand. It looked rather familiar and I think I even recognized said piece of paper. There would be no pad on the back this time and no Star Wars quotes, well, maybe a stern,’ I am your father’, but that would be it. That piece of paper was my writing to the headmaster. You know, the letter on chewing gum and chewing gum trees. To my opinion it was a true work of art; I had spent over an hour writing that letter and I am sure that there weren’t many mistakes in there. Many a pupil would have been jealous of this and if it had been a test I would have surely gotten full points on this one. I guess our headmaster thought differently. Haters gonna hate.

Most of the time it’s Mum who does the talking, this time Dad addressed me (unfortunately without ‘sir’). Dad said,’ Son, do you recognize this?’ and I hate these questions. They know perfectly well that it was my work of art and that I would be a complete retard if I didn’t recognize it; it’s got my handwriting, my signature and my name on it! So, what else could I say then,’ Nope, never seen it before in my life.’

Dad,    ‘ Are you sure? Take a good look at it.’

Me,      ‘ Lemme see, well, now that you mention it, this signature here at the bottom  does look a little familiar. I guess, yeah, yep. You know what, Dad, I have definitely seen it before.’

Dad,    ‘ Could you explain this?’

Me,      ‘ Well, you see, Dad, no.’

Dad,    ‘ Son, the headmaster was not very happy about it.’

This is where I started to look a little sad.

Dad,    ‘ We had a long talk and I think in the end it was perfectly clear that we totally support your action and that we would like the school to seriously consider this idea and see what they could do to realize it.’

Okay, so I didn’t really see that one coming.

Dad,    ‘ Keep calm and carry on. You’re making Mum and Dad proud.’

Another one I didn’t see coming, especially from Dad. Naturally I went to my room immediately to start thinking about my next letter, see if I could make them even prouder. By the way, I was also quite proud of my parents the way they stood up for me and all.
Last thing I’m going to say and then I’m off to bed. I’m really looking forward to the barbecue and I do so hope more people are coming. I’ll ask Mr Bent if he’s coming, too. Though I really kind of doubt it. He is not really fond of Unice (biggest understatement ever). Nobody is, but we’re going to have fun in spite of Unice. We’ve got lots of friendly neighbours who have already had it with her but can’t say ‘no’ to a good old-fashioned barbecue. Especially when it’s free. She’d better have some animal friendly meat, too, because I’m bringing Evelyn and she only eats non-animal meat. Dad said we could always have a ‘unicecorn on the cob’, but nobody laughed. This is when I thought of Ron Lewis who once said,’ Notice nobody else is laughing, dad?’

That’s it, see me tomorrow.


11 thoughts on “I Wish I Knew A Good Title For This

  1. Arthur – – See? Now even your letters might get published! This was a great post and not just because you quoted my youngest son (whom you can see at Disneyland today on Facebook) and it’s also okay that you credited Mr. Lewis with the line….he needs something funny attributed to him. 😉 but I just love that your parents had your back! Can’t wait for the BBQ post. It should be spicy, in more ways than one. Till tomorrow….

    • Dear Stephanie,

      Are you going to go to Dinsneyland!? Wow, that sounds great. I’ve never really been to a themepark. We might be going to one this summer, but definitely not Disneyland.
      I credited Ron because he was the one who mentioned it to me. Shall I add that it was your son who always says it?
      This BBQ is going to be really something, I can almost guarantee it. Hope you are doing fine. I’ve been quite busy lately, but I’ll be checking out some more of your reading a.s.a.p.

      Kind regards,

      • Dear Arthur – – I had to laugh at your inadvertently calling it Dinsneyland because the din was excruciating today. What themeparks are near you? Do you like super scary rollercoasters? And no, there’s no need to add that my son says that quote. Mr. Lewis is quick to shield our children from rampant, dangerous Blog and Facebook stalkers by protecting their privacy. Thank you anyhow.

      • Dear Ms. Lewis,

        Witticism? That’s a great word! I have never heard of that before. Is that a witty criticism? The intent of my comment was supposed to be humorous. Perhaps I should have included a smiley face? Although you know I don’t like our kid’s pictures on Facebook, (and you continue to do it anyway), I hope that you didn’t take my comment as an oversensitism! 😉

        Yours truly,

        Mr. Lewis

  2. Hi Arthur. As usual, I enjoyed reading your post but, as Ms. Lewis was quick to point out, the “Notice nobody else is laughing, dad?” quote is a comment that I frequently seem to hear from my 10 year old son. Hmmm, I seem to be my best (and only?) audience sometimes. 😉 Have a great weekend, and we can’t wait to hear about “the barbecue.” Have fun!


    • Dear Ron,

      Shall I add that to my text? It seems only fair if I mentioned your son, though I don’t know if your son wants to be mentioned on the Internet.
      I can’t wait for the BBQ either, and I can’t wait for your next lyrics. Maybe your kids will inspire you.

      Kind regards,


      • Hi Arthur,

        I don’t mind if you mention my son (as I already did), but don’t go to any extra trouble. No big deal either way. I did show him what you wrote in your post, and he DID laugh! 😉 He thought that was very funny!

        Just curious, when you write a poem or song lyrics, do you usually just sit and write or do you try to put your words to music? I’m no musician or guitarist, but I usually have a few simple guitar chords, and the music usually influences the topic and the lyrics. Was always kind of interested to see how professional song writers do it.

        Thanks again, and give my regards to Unice or Eunice or ???.


  3. Dear Ron and Stephanie,

    I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, you really should do a blog together, this is amazing. I love the way you two play with words and are constantly outwitticising each other. I should save these conversations for when I get married (or divorced) they might come in handy when I am having an argument with my ex-wife to be.
    I’ll not mention your son’s name, but I guess it’s pretty clear to all and sundry now that it’s your kid and that his picture is on Facebook. I don’t like having my picture on Facebook either. Maybe I worry too much. What will my future boss think when he sees pictures of me as a teenager? Some kids post realy weird pictures of themselves on the Whole World Watches and once it’s up there … it’s up there.

    Kind regards,


    • Arthur, that is CLASSIC… your “ex-wife to be!” Why didn’t I think of that?!? Seriously, I REALLY hope that never happens to you, but that is a very funny statement. I’ll have to remember that and plagiarize it sometime. 😉

      What you said about putting your pictures and personal information on Facebook or the Internet in general is so true! You are smart to think ahead and consider what kind of information future employers, etc. will find that could adversely affect you later on. And as you said, “Once it’s up there, it’s up there.”

      I don’t think you need to worry about your teenage pictures, but I know that some people put pictures of themselves doing very stupid and compromising things, and one poor decision can end up haunting them for the rest of their lives. Don’t worry about it too much, but I think you are smart to worry about it a little.

      All the best,


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